Childcare crisis? What to do if it goes wrongYou've sorted the childcare, gone back to work and settled into something resembling a routine. Then, just as the guilt of being a working mum starts to fade, you get a nagging suspicion that your child's carer is not quite good enough. What can you do?
Not happy with your child's carer?It's a possibility all of us face. According to National Day Nurseries Association, 58 per cent of women with a child under five work, yet three quarters of working parents say there is not enough childcare. It's hardly surprising, then, that many of us feel we're settling for care that might not be our first choice. Sometimes this is a matter of accepting that the carer simply does things a different way - this won't harm your child and the change might even benefit him or her. But you should seriously re-think your decision if:
How to tackle the situationStay calm and try to nip potential problems in the bud before they escalate. Purnima Tanuka, chief executive of National Day Nurseries Association, says: "Most matters can be resolved before they have a chance to become issues. Make sure you build a good relationship with your child's nursery - this will help you to easily voice your thoughts. Nurseries are always keen to make sure they listen to and meet parents' needs and will also have a complaints policy in the event a formal complaint is made." The National Childminding Association, which represents registered childminders and nannies, agrees. Charles Rice, director of membership and professional development, says: "Regular communication is essential for keeping a good working relationship with your childminder or nanny. If anything is worrying you, you should speak to them straight away as worries can sometimes grow out of proportion. Encourage them to do the same. Most difficulties can be resolved through a friendly chat, or by referring back to the contract together."
You might feel, however, as though the problems are too serious to ignore and the best solution is to start afresh in a new placement. While it might be tempting to hurl insults and refuse to pay any money owed, the law might not be on your side. All good nurseries, childminders and nannies will have drawn up a contract at the start of your arrangement and in most cases, the notice period will have to be paid, however unfair this seems. "Notice periods vary from nursery to nursery but typically parents will be expected to give a month's notice or, if they want to remove their child immediately, pay a month's fees," says Purnima. "A contract is a legally binding document and parents should read it carefully before signing. If a parent feels there has been a serious breach of safety, they should speak to the nursery to discuss the situation. If a parent has a complaint that relates to the standard of childcare they can contact Ofsted, which has a complaint and investigation procedure. If the incident leads to a parent removing their child, they should look at their contract and seek legal advice if appropriate." Where next?You might be perfectly happy sticking to the same type of childcare you originally opted for, but it might also be a good time to review whether your child might be happier in a nursery if she's been looked after in a home environment, or vice versa. The choice between a childminder, day nursery, nanny or au pair is a very personal one and different options suit different families. NDNA has produced an on-line fact-sheet to help parents choose a nursery, but the rules are universal and apply to all kinds of childcare. Make a shortlist and visit all options on it. Trust your instincts and take a good look around - if the children and carers look happy, the chances are your child will be too. You can also look at the carer's latest Ofsted report and ask for references from other parents. According to the NCMA, the best place to start is by asking family and friends for recommendations. "But stay focused," says Charles. "At the end of the day, it's your decision and what's right for your neighbour might not be right for you." Don't worry, be happy"Parents face very difficult choices when balancing work and family life and it can be easy to feel guilty," says NDNA's Purnima. "This can be especially difficult if children cry when left, but remember they will soon settle." The important thing is to try not to feel too guilty about choosing the "wrong" care in the first place. As long as you put things right and find a situation you and your child are happy with, then you are doing the best job you possibly can - and that's all any of us can aim for! Useful contacts www.childcarelink.gov.uk by Rebecca Blunt Where to next?
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