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A chance encounter with the same caring and reassuring midwife who delivered her first baby four years earlier led to a magical home birth experience for Suzanne Pemberton...
My first baby, Sarah, was born in hospital in April 2001. The labour and birth were straightforward and quick, and I attributed this largely to the comforting presence of a community midwife, Julie Marsden who was doing an extra shift at the hospital that night. I felt that she respected my wishes and was a calming, capable presence throughout.
The story really starts, though, 4 years later when I was about to give birth to my second child. I had decided on a home birth because I felt that, although my first birth experience at the hospital was positive, the aftercare I received on the uncomfortable post-natal ward was a terrible start to motherhood.
The midwife who looked after my antenatal care was encouraging about a home birth, so after we'd determined the baby was head-down at 35 weeks, I went out and bought my waterproof sheeting and arranged my prescription for Meptid.
In
the late evening of 10th May 2005, at 4 days overdue, I had my first contraction.
By midnight they were already getting stronger so we called the labour
ward, who contacted the community midwife. About half an hour later there
was a knock on the door and my husband answered it. "Hi, I'm the community
midwife…" said a voice.
Instantly I was transported back 4 years to that night in April 2001. And sure enough, when the midwife stepped through the door, there was no mistaking her face. You don't ever forget the face of the midwife who delivers your baby, do you? It was Julie.
The city of Leeds has approximately 80 community midwives, of which only 2 are on call on any given night. So the chances of Julie being there that first night in 2001 in hospital were pretty slim, but for her to be there the second time…well, I wouldn't waste my money betting on such odds.
As the labour progressed, Julie seemed to know instinctively what I needed. I have never been able to have active labours, as I felt very sick and weak both times, so I just needed to slump sideways on my bean bag and have people around me. Julie read my signs well, and sat on the floor watching me covertly, chatting to my Mum (who had arrived in case we needed someone to look after Sarah) and Simon, my husband. I retreated into myself.
The Entonox tube provided comfort, as did the low chatter of familiar voices in the background. Knowing that I was safe and comfortable in my own home, with my husband and mum nearby, a familiar midwife to take charge, and my beloved daughter upstairs safe in her bed…well, I cannot honestly express what a magical experience that labour was.
Although she was seemingly engrossed in her conversation with my family, Julie never took her eye off me. As soon as my contractions changed and I moved towards the transitional phase of labour, Julie noticed. Instantly she was by my side, hand on my arm, speaking reassuringly in a low voice.
She helped me round into a delivery position and the world seemed to come back into focus as I realised we were near the end. I smiled round at everyone. I felt so happy and relaxed and completely elated.
At 7.02am Anna Grace was born, watched by her father, grandmother and by-now-part-of-the-family Julie, weighing 6lb 10.5oz. She was, and still is, a happy, placid, and adorable child.
As the second midwife (Barbara Morris) helped me upstairs to have a bath, little Sarah emerged onto the landing blinking in the half-light. "Is the baby here, Mummy?" she mumbled. I let her go downstairs to meet her baby sister for the first time, and it was a beautiful start to her life as a big sister. She still adores Baby Anna and we've had no jealousy whatsoever. Much to my surprise!
I've never had the chance to thank Julie myself, so this really is my opportunity. Having her there the first time was lovely in itself as she was so wonderful, but to have her there for my second baby was like a miracle. It gives me a warm glow just to think of that night. I wish every woman's birth experience could be so fantastic.
Midwife Caroline Flint comments on Suzanne's birth:
Suzanne's story shows what a delight it is to already know your midwife when you go into labour. Suzanne was able (like all other mammals need to) to retreat into herself, she found Julie's presence so calming and reassuring that she was able to relax and let her body get on with being in labour - an ideal situation.
Suzanne describes the peaceful murmur of familiar voices - again the midwife not overlooking her but "covertly" watching and listening. Suzanne felt safe and comfortable and when things speeded up Julie knew straight away and was instantly by her side - encouraging her and supporting her.
Interesting to note that there has been no jealousy between little Sarah towards her baby sister - I have noticed that when older siblings are introduced to a new baby at birth or very soon afterwards there is frequently no jealousy.Home birth after all is so ordinary, a new baby emerges into a busy world of toys, breakfasts, cups of tea, the postman coming, so for a little child it is not a dramatic or traumatic event, it is just a baby being born in the sitting room and Mum and Dad are here (and Grandma) so all is well.
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