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Can't sleep - won't sleep?There’s nothing more pitiful than finally crashing out in bed after a long day, dozing off then hearing a plaintive cry becoming full-on screams echoing from your baby’s bedroom... "But my baby sleeps through the night," you say, "I don’t have to worry about such things!" Yet nearly every parent, at one time or another will have to cope with even the best sleeper waking up at night. With the exception of the suggestion of the routine, the other suggestions are for small children who have a consistent problem, rather than just when you want to persuade a normally good child to sleep. If illness or discomfort can be ruled out, then the child might just be testing the boundaries to see how you respond. If you want to try to settle your child back down, there are a number of methods you can use:
Most parents find a combination of methods may work for them. Babyworld is not suggesting you stick to a method if you feel it is not working, or if you would be more comfortable doing something else, these are simply methods which have been tried and have worked, although none has been markedly more successful than any other. A positive routineThis routine can be flexible but may include a bath, cuddle, feed then bed, or
also include a story or a song. Work out what works for you then stick to broadly the same
routine each evening where possible, to give baby something to respond to. Babyworld mum Vicky said: "A bedtime routine cannot be started too early in a child's life. At about 8 weeks, no matter what had happened during the day, at around 6.30 - 7.00pm we'd run a bath, come downstairs for the last feed and put our son to bed (in his Moses basket) upstairs. If he woke for a feed after that, before we went to bed, the lights would stay off and everything would be very quiet while I fed him (just like it would be at 3am) and he'd go back to sleep no problem." Babies don’t generally respond to routine until about three to seven months, but starting the routine before will mean your child learns what to expect early on. Babyworld mum Jenny said: "My midwife told me babies had no reason to distinguish between night and day, you have to help them. She said always give a bath before what you see as the last ‘day’ feed and it will give the baby a point of reference that this feed is different. "We gave her an evening bath more or less from when we came home from hospital, and she went through the night at 10 weeks even though she was breastfed. She’s 14 months now and hasn’t so far had any regular sleep problems. I always thank my midwife when I see her and pass the tip to everyone who’s pregnant!" Gradually ignoring tantrums for longerThis involves ignoring a tantrum for a preset time interval, lengthening that interval each week. At the end of the interval, the parent goes into the room, puts the child back in bed if necessary, and tells them it is time for sleep before leaving the room again, after about 15 seconds. Systematic ignoring (also called extinction)Go to the baby when you first hear his or her cries. Check that the baby is not ill and change nappies if necessary. Don’t pick up the baby, soothe, feed or interact in any way. Once parents are reassured that the child is not ill, leave the room and don’t return for the duration of that crying episode. Any more episodes in the night are dealt with in the same way. Modified extinctionParents ignore the child for 20 minutes before checking as before. After reassuring themselves that the child is not ill, they leave and only return if the problem continues for another 20 minutes. A tailored sleep programmeIf the problem persists for a long time, a medical professional such as your GP or health visitor may think you could benefit from help from a sleep clinic. Your GP would be able to give you details, if it is thought this may help. Research drawn from the British Medical Journal’s paper on reviewing treatments for settling problems (ed320). Where to next?
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