Veronica's story: 'You never stop wanting that baby back'"I have four children and originally lost my fourth. The pregnancy seemed normal apart from the fact I felt so ill and sick most of the time. I went for my routine scan at 17 weeks to see this little image on the screen and to be told that my baby looked small and had died at around 13 weeks. "I was booked in for the next morning for delivery as my womb was too enlarged to have the baby removed. After six hours and two lots of pessaries, I gave birth but nothing was really recognisable to me. I had to be told five minutes later that the baby had come out. "I was asked if I wanted to see the baby and with the help of a midwife, who was brilliant, we looked at my baby lying on sterile paper in a basket. No tears, just amazement at this little thing that had tiny fingers and looked asleep. They took him away and that was when the crying began – I wanted him back inside me so much, even if he was dead I was still keeping him warm. "Even now I miss him, you never get over the feeling of wanting that baby back, even after getting pregnant again four months later. To others, having another baby is brilliant but I find it hard that he decided to come on the same day exactly a year later." |
