Would you be offended if a stranger called you 'sweetie'? Vote now! Do you regret the name(s) you gave to your child(ren)? Vote now! How many Easter eggs will you buy? Vote now!

Win a fantastic prize when you recommend the babyworld shop to 6 friends click here

Hands off my bump!

Why is it that your body becomes public property the minute your bump shows? You may not be Jade or Sophie Ellis Baxter, but everyone still wants to touch your tummy and ask how much you weigh. Joanna Moorhead looks at how to handle the space invaders...

Can we talk about something else?
Revealed: you and your partner have sex!
Back off, stranger!
What happened to the great British reserve?
How to cope
Top 10 most personal pregnancy questions
Where to next?

Can we talk about something else?

It wasn't exactly the question on everyone's lips as one of the first year's Big Brother contestant Helen Adams, was released from the house. "How's the bump?" she screeched, as expectant presenter Davina McCall led her down to the studio. With 100 flashbulbs popping around them and the nation glued to their TV sets, pregnancy was probably the last thing Davina wanted to have a conversation about. "The bump's fine," she said, in a shut-up-about-it-now kind of voice. And Helen did.

To be fair, Davina had it coming: if you don't want to spend all evening
talking about your pregnancy, lesson number one is don't draw attention to
it. So wearing a glittery T-shirt proclaiming 'Big Mutha' across your chest
was probably the teeniest bit red rag to a bull. Especially as Helen loves glitter! Next time, Davina, I'd go for the cover-up.

Revealed: you and your partner have sex!

The trouble is, having a baby means that everyone knows your business - and an awful lot of them want to talk about it. Everyone recognises that having a baby is right up there as one of the Big Life Events, along with getting hitched, getting divorced, moving house and changing jobs. But the major difference between all these other personal mega-happenings and having a baby is that no one outside your trusted circle need know. Contrast to being pregnant, where everyone you meet - from the dustbin man to the friend of a friend you're introduced to in the pub to your boss - is immediately aware of your most intimate secret.

And it's not just one secret, it's several. Number one, obviously, every stranger you meet knows you're having a baby; number two, they know you are - or until very recently, were - probably in some kind of relationship and number three, they know you're sexually active.

Back off, stranger!

As if all that wasn't bad enough, knowing so much (and yet so little) about you seems to make every stranger you meet feel that they have the automatic right to ask all sorts of intimate questions. "We met some people at dinner not long ago and within ten minutes of our arrival I was being asked when I'd conceived the baby!" says my friend Paula. "Other people have asked all sorts of very personal information like what antenatal tests I'd had, what I'd have done if the results had been bad, that sort of thing. I'm afraid I react very badly to it - I just don't see why being pregnant should give people you hardly know carte blanche to grill you on your deepest moral beliefs and personal circumstances."

Some strangers even - oh travesty - think they have the right to touch, actually touch, your tum. In any other circumstances being touched within seconds of meeting someone in a pub would have you screaming that you'd been assaulted, but for some reason when you're pregnant you're expected to grin and bear it and pretend it's OK. Strange that amidst those groaning rails of cringe-making sloganised T-shirts so beloved of maternity wear shops there aren't any that proclaim 'Just leave it alone'. Next time Davina has the chance to flash a message to the nation on her pregnant abdomen, perhaps she'd consider something along those lines.

What happened to the great British reserve?

And what is it about pregnancy that makes everyone think they can weigh in with a view or a question? "Someone I've met a couple of times asked me last week whether it was a planned pregnancy!" splutters Paula. "Why is it that the rules of polite conversation seem to go out of the window when you're having a baby - it's as though you should be prepared to answer any question, however intrusive."

Psychologist Dr Josephine Green of the Mother and Infant Research Unit at Leeds University agrees that there does seem to be some kind of breakdown in what we'd consider the norms of polite conversation when it comes to talking to pregnant women. "Perhaps it's because so much is obvious about you and it leads complete strangers to feel they have a right to talk about all sorts of things they usually wouldn't," she says. "Having said that, it's also true that especially the first time you're pregnant, you often do like to be noticed and to have people give you a bit of extra attention."

Perhaps the moral of the tale is that we can't have it both ways. And when the worst comes to the worst and you're faced with an outrageous question or an unwanted prod, you can always console yourself with the thought that it's done with the friendliest possible intentions!

How to cope

Don't talk about your pregnancy all day, every day if you don't
want it to be the focus of attention
If you can't stand being prodded, tell people your bump is really
uncomfortable and ask them to leave it alone
If you get asked a question about being pregnant, answer it
as briefly as possible and move on to another subject

Where to next?

Anyone said anything really outrageous to you? Fed up with people getting too intimate with your bump? Talk to others on our being pregnant
Need help choosing a name? Use our fun tool
Find out what's happening when with our personal pregnancy planner
Worried about the birth? Check our expert information