When we got together…

Our antenatal club did more than just talk to each other online. They actually met up, seven months into their pregnancy, in Leicester. The meeting involved ten pregnant women, their partners and children all doing the Hokey Cokey. This is their feedback from the day…

• How the idea came about
• Where we met
• The day of reckoning
• Our ambitious entertainer!
• The end
• What the others thought

How the idea came about

The idea of meeting up came very early in the October 2004 antenatal forum. We found that we were posting so many messages, and that there was so much banter going back and forth, that meeting up would be a great way of getting to know each other better (if that would be at all possible, after all, we already knew each other's intimate thoughts and troubles!!!).

Every one of us had some sort of input, whether it was calculating the amount of food we would need to printing off name badges! As time progressed, and the meeting drew nearer, it was obvious that Debs Lucas, whose idea it was to meet up, was going to have to hand over. She'd already had one stay in hospital and her attendance at the meeting was already looking shaky, to say the least.

Where we met

One of our members, Heidi, said her local social club may have a room we could hire for the afternoon. They did, so preparations got underway. Postings on the forum increased ten-fold as everyone wanted to help. We decided to all bring something to eat. Some of us bought salads and meat, some bought crisps and nuts, some bought samosas, a huge chilli was made, cheeses and pasta salads were abundant and of course there were loads of cakes (for the children!!).

The Social Club said there was a small bar within the room we could hire but, to make it worth their while opening it, they had to take £100 on it - or we faced a £25 surcharge. Well, that was it, the gauntlet was thrown down for the boys, who I might add, did a marvellous job in getting us to the £100 target and beyond! Us ladies drank our fair share of orange juices and lemonades. I think it was at this point that the idea of a second meeting started forming in everyone's mind - we reckoned us girls would have reached the target a whole lot sooner, had we not been pregnant!

The day of reckoning

The day itself dawned. We were travelling from all parts of the country -Liverpool, the Cotswolds, Shropshire, Gloucestershire, Northamptonshire and Bedfordshire. Leicester was the most central location, which was why we chose it. Unfortunately Debs Lucas was back in hospital with labour threatening so it was all off for her.

We'd all arrived by 2.45pm and already were chatting away, like we did this on a regular occasion. You would never believe that none of us had ever met before! The boys were already "bonding" at the bar and us girls were discussing our aches and pains and thoughts and hopes.

The buffet table was heaving, so we all tucked in before Charlie the Clown arrived. Good job really, little did we know that we needed all our energy!

Our ambitious entertainer!

Charlie arrived and commenced his magic act, which had the children (and most of the dads) mesmerised. It was quite interactive and the children were all eager to participate. After Charlie finished his act the music started. Now, we were all a bit puzzled by this as we thought his act was over, but no, Charlie asked all the pregnant ladies to take to the floor for the Cha Cha Slide. No-one was really willing to be the first one up, so I decided to take charge and ordered them all on to the dance floor. The Cha Cha Slide (I have since learned) is like a mixture of aerobics, the Macarena and the Funky Chicken, all put together with some mamba-sounding music! Great after 15 vodkas but not so easy when you're stone-cold sober and seven months pregnant. However, we all gave it our best shot (Iraina has video evidence but has become the victim of a gagging order!).

Charlie the Clown then decided that what was good for the mums was good for the dads, so on went the Hokey Cokey and this time everyone joined in! It's at this point I think Charlie realised he'd bitten off more than he could chew because he started asking where the nearest hospital was! It was a great workout and a fabulous ice breaker - not that we needed it at that point!

The end

Time was moving on now and people were going to have to start their onward journey home or to their hotels, so we said our goodbyes, cleared away the leftovers (not that there was too much!) and helped tidy the room, all vowing to meet again before too much longer.

I, like the nine others, slept like a log that night.

What the others thought

"I was really nervous of meeting people who I had only met online before. The four-hour journey was awful but it was lovely to walk in and recognise some people from their photos. I'd love to do another meeting and I'm sure more people would turn up after seeing how well it all went first time around, plus next time there is going to be at least double there as we'll all have 'mini-me's to bring along. That may be one noisy meeting!"
Caz

"I wondered if I would get on as well with people in 'real life' as you do online. I also found it difficult to remember things about everyone, and almost felt like I should have 'revised' beforehand so I didn't get anything wrong! However, I needn't have worried. It was wonderful to meet everyone, and it's added an extra dimension to Babyworld being able to put faces (and bumps) to names. The bravery award for the day must go to the children's entertainer, who got ten heavily pregnant women (plus partners and kids) doing the Hokey Cokey and the Cha Cha Slide. I thought we might have to call an ambulance!"
Jo

" I felt like I knew people quite well by the time the meeting came around. The one minor concern was how the boys would get on ... shouldn't have worried about that as they all bonded over a pint and thoroughly enjoyed themselves - it was the lads that had to be dragged away at the end of the day!

"There was much we didn't talk about. The first-timers (including me!) had a great opportunity to pick the brains of the experienced mums, compare treatment at our various hospitals, talk through worries and just generally chat about how we'd met our partners, how we felt about the pregnancies, side effects, heartburn relief, etc etc etc!"
Clarinda

"It was odd actually meeting the people I had previously discussed leaking nipples and other embarrassing things with! But it was nice to really put a face to the people who have supported me and got me through the last 7.5 months."
Helen

"Our main concern on the day was about Debbie Lucas, one of the main organisers of the day. She had started having contractions and had been taken into hospital, so sadly couldn't make it on the day. Before we went home we had found out Debs was okay and they had managed to stop the labour for now.

The man entertaining the children had all us mummies up dancing which the dads loved. The dads even threatened to post our dancing on the internet! We had some money left over and we had all decided to donate this money to the Tommy's charity in memory of one of the ladies on our forum, Deborah, who sadly lost her little baby Isobel recently."
Iraina

"It was lovely to meet some of the ladies I had been chatting with over a keyboard. Mark and I both enjoyed ourselves a lot I'm glad that he came with me as he reads lots of posts on babyworld and has even posted some messages himself when I have been in hospital, so he enjoyed meeting the girls too."
Mel